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Ahh... again... summer's nearing the end. I can't reiterate and emphasize this enough. Yet i can't bring myself to do anything preparatory or productive. Sometimes i momentarily forget the pain that twists deep inside like a serrated knife. Sometimes it's not even that bad and then others it can't get any worse. It's almost tangible pain. So many reasons...
I guess it gets worse every time after hanging out with friends and such... i realize they're just going to leave soon anyway. So it makes me wonder why now is even happening? What's the point of fun and making memories now? Well as a 'photographer' i would say this does matter, since the good memories will always be there, even when the people are not and times have changed. I know i say this kind of thing all the time. And i feel regretful; maybe i should have just pushed myself, tried harder....heck, i should have tried to go to Waco with all of the Baylor people...
I'll never stop regretting, and (even though i know that only actions, not words, can change things,) so i'll just keep saying the same old regrets as long as i feel them.
Well it's light outside. Forget sleeping for today i guess....
::random:: this song used to make me cry when i was little
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-zFd6fmJT0
Words like "agony", "anguish", "torment", "grief", or "distress" could accurately describe how i feel right now.
Yes, it's that bad. A wrenching, seizing pain.
It's like being sick; you just have to cover up and roll over and wait for it to subside; literally or figuratively..
Heh. ;D
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| | Posted 7/5/2009 6:26 AM - 1 View - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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